30
Apr

So I haven’t had a chance to post very much because I just got home from the hospital yesterday after completing surgery.  I decided rather than post one long massive posting with everything I can think of I will try to make it a little more organized and make multiple smaller postings by topics.  That way I can work with my ADHD and stick to topical discussions rather than let my mind wander and get sidetracked forgetting important notes I wanted to record.  More to come shortly …

30
Apr
29
Apr
29
Apr

surgery went amazingly, perfectly, remarkably well.  dr. zomorodi came out to give us the good news just about 2.5 hours after the surgery initially began.  we were elated to hear that everything went according to plan and that it was already confirmed that will’s spinal fluid was once again freely flowing.  they let us know that will was moved to the icu and shuffled us from the 3rd floor waiting area to the 4th floor waiting area.  we’d had an outback steakhouse style pager throughout the entire process that alerted us when he was ready for visiting pre-op, when he was given his second round of anesthesia, when the surgery began, when the sutures were being put in, and when the surgery was over.  we carried this little pager with us up to the 4th floor and waited for some buzzing action to go see our surgery survivor.  after about an hour of us being impatient i checked with the nurse who told me will was ready for two visitors.  lori and i gathered up all of our worldly possessions (including and not limited to a rather large bag that weighed about 400 pounds) and made our way back to the icu. 

we found will laying peacefully in the bed in the icu, looking as great as usual and were surprised how wonderful he appeared.  he seemed to be dealing well with the medications, morphine pain pump, and other drugs the attending nurses were supplying him with.  he rested well and immediately fell in love with some lime sherbet.  the nurse made sure he had an endless supply and i stayed with him until they kicked me out for the night.

the following morning i showed back up at 8:30am as soon as visiting hours began and found will sitting straight up in the bed munching on some breakfast.  i thought he was doing pretty good to be eating scrambled eggs, but it was not until about 30 minutes later that i found out he had already scarfed down some bacon and home fries!  that boy was hoongry!  he did well throughout the morning and they got him up and walking a lap around the icu before they determined he was ready to move to a regular room around 1pm.  they asked if he would like to be driven in his bed, or walk over to the new room and he decided he was good enough to walk, so off they went.  lori and i tagged along behind him lugging our 400lb bag and everything else we’d seemed to accumulate over the past 24 hours. 

we arrived to will’s new room – 4130 on the same floor as the icu, just around a different wing.  we got will settled in and tried to get him comfortable.  he seemed to be doing okay for a while, but then his morphene began to wear off and the pain began to escalate.  a group of 1st year med students dropped by to ask some questions and learn about patient-doctor relationships, and we allowed them to sit and chat for about half an hour.  after this visit will really felt his condition was declining even further and we then had to try and seek some additional attention from our nurse.  unfortunately the pain combo they first attempted was not putting a dent in the pain and the pain had risen from a 3/10 to a 9/10.  will felt frustrated and irritated in the lack of time of the response and the pain he was feeling.  luckily a new nurse came on board around 7:30pm and sat and listened to our frustration and got will on a new pain combo.  his new medicines are working much better to curb the pain and he is now settled at a 3 – 4 out of 10 for the most part.

he’s been up walking two laps today and has gone up and down three stairs to prepare him for getting into the house.  the nurse removed the original gauze bandage and replaced it with a new bandage.  will’s scar is sutured with nylon stitches and looks perfectly healthy.  the incision measures about 5 inches in length and extends about 1 inch past his hair line. 

we’re staying on top of his pain meds and keeping him perky with piles of delicious treats from the cafeteria and around the durham area.  he’s received 4 flower arrangements and two balloon bouquets that brighten up his room and help him keep focus on the healing process.  he attempts his neck exercises and works on them as much as he can while his pain meds are in full effect.  so far so good.

he’s been a trooper, cracked some jokes, and looks like a precious doll resting in his bed.  so proud of all he’s done, the pain he is dealing with, and the grace in which he has handled it all.

28
Apr
27
Apr

OK so this was obviously not written on the day of the surgery but I have back dated it so it makes more sense in the flow of postings.

On the morning of the surgery we were awakened by an 8:00 am telephone call from the hospital.  They had a cancellation and wanted to see if we could be there by 9:30.  We confirmed we could do that and began scrambling to do everything that needed to be done before leaving at 8:30 to arrive on time.  Luckily we had done all of our packing the night before so we didn’t have to worry about forgetting anything in the mayhem.

So I got to take my final shower with the “special soap” (anti-bacterial sponge).  I tried to hurry but make sure I was thorough at the same time.  Once showering was complete we all got on different phones and began maddly calling people to update them that the surgery time had changed.

We got in the car and began the trek to Duke in Durham.  Luckily I was still trying to wake up so I didn’t have a chance to get nervous on the way over.  Once we arrived serendipity kicked in as we were there just in time and got the last valet parking spot so we didn’t have to worry about being late.  We made our way to the 3rd floor check-in with Matthew (our pastor) was waiting.  I believe he was relieved to see us because I had called him letting him know my arrival time was now 9:30 am but when he asked about me at the check-in counter the nurse told him I was arriving later in the afternoon.

When I checked in with the nurse she just gave she gave me a pager and visitor stickers for friends and family.  She told me to come see here when the pager went off.  We all went to sit in the waiting area and get ready to talk when the pager went off.  I got up and returned to the nurses desk and she said the nurse was on her way back to get me and told me to take the pager to my wife and it would go off when she could come see me.  So I gave the pager to my wife and waited out front of the door waiting for the nurse while getting more and more nervous.  The nurse arrived and told me to follow her.

My nervousness increased as I passed by various ER looking rooms with people hooked up getting ready for surgery.  The first person I saw was awake with an IV in and one of those halos around his head.  I reiterated my standard comment to the nurse that if I am awake for that we are going to have a problem.  I said you all can do whatever you want once I am knocked out but if I have to deal with any of that mess when awake we might as well stop now.  I was however amused to see that he was wearing the traditional blue gown but a red cap instead of a blue cap.  I later learned the significance of this.

We arrived at my room and I was given my socks, gown, and red cap to change into while the nurse left drawing the curtains behind her to give me some privacy.  I changed and got up in the bed trying to think happy thoughts to try and calm my nerves. Then began the long ordeal of preparations for surgery.  I was asked the standard medical history and who are you and why are you here questions.  I got hooked up to IV lines with some explanation that when I wake up from surgery I may have additional IV lines and not to be surprised if I had one in my neck.  Then the waiting game began.  The nurse left and for I waited for what seemed like an eternity before a different nurse came in to check my vitals.  Once she was done she went back to the computer to type and a different nurse said my family was asking when they would get to see me and was informed that they were just called to come back.  My wife later told me that she had gone up to the check in desk to ask how much longer it would be and just as the nurse called to ask her pager went off.

So my wife, sister-in-law, and pastor all came back to visit for a bit and say a quick pre-surgery prayer.  Having them there helped a great deal with calming my nerves.  At around 11:45 the anasthesiologist came in introduce himself and ask his round of questions.  Around 12:00 they said the surgeons were ready, handed me the blue cap to put on to replace my red cap, told my wife that she had to leave now but they would come get her to let her know how the surgery went, and administered the cocktails in my IV.  Apparently I heard all of this along with how they were going to take me to another waiting area and administer some more medicine before getting me in the halo and beginning.  The part I failed to hear was that I would already be asleep before I got to that other waiting area.  I was already gone before the even rolled me out of that room.  In some ways I suppose the sneak attack was appreciated because I didn’t have to worry about when they were going to put me to sleep, I just went out unexpectedly and woke later after everything was done.

Supposedly they woke me that evening in the ICU when my wife and sister-in-law were there visiting but I don’t really remember much at this point.  The only things I remember are the nurse helping me to sit up a little saying she would fluff my pillow to make me more comfortable (later my wife informed me it was because I had so much blood draining out of my head that it had soaked the pillow … I am very appreciate I did not know about this at the time) and also visiting hours being over and my wife having to leave for the night.  Then I was

27
Apr
27
Apr

I went back with Will and Matthew for a pre-surgery prayer session. Will found comfort in the calming words Matthew offered. I stayed with Will until the first series of anesthesia cocktails were administered and they took him off to another pre-op waiting area where the breathing tube and head confinement gear would be put in place. We were just paged again and informed that the surgery is now underway. We’ve been here since 9:30am and they tell us that Will should be done with his surgery and in the ICU recovery afterwards. Lots of nervousness and jitters were in place for both Will and myself this morning, but we know that God has everything under control and that we will have him resting calmly soon and on the road to recovery in no time. Thanks to everyone for your continued love and support. Will update you as soon as we get more information.

26
Apr

26
Apr

So as you may notice I am jumping around in the time frame a bit.  I decided to post smaller topic specific entries so they can be digested by the reader in smaller more meaningful chunks.  This will also help me work with my ADHD and ensure that I do not forget to post something important to me because my mind wandered off on a tangent as I changed topics.  You will also notice a common theme in most of my postings.  My emotional journey was very diverse and my mood could change quickly for no apparent reason.  Many people will feel this way and it is completely normal for what you are going through, I just tried to make sure I allowed myself to accept and experience these feelings instead of bottling them up.

So the day before surgery arrived and was met with both excitement and anxiety.  I was sad because we were leaving the beach and I knew I would not be returning until September.  I was excited because we were going to pick up Lori at the airport in the evening and it is always a blast visiting with her.  I also felt anxious because it seemed time was slipping through my fingers so fast.  I still didn’t really know what to expect for recovery from the surgery but it seemed as if each step we took (leaving the beach, calling the surgery hotline, picking up Lori at the airport) seemed to happen at a steadily accelerating pace propelling me towards the dreaded surgery as time passed in a blur with events happening merely in my peripheral vision.  I started to panic feeling as if I was not ready and not prepared but surgery was looming ever closer on the horizon and there was nothing I could do to make the situation any better.  I tried to simply hold on tight, keep all the pieces together, and not fall off the ride as we zoomed right along.

Shortly before I was to call the Duke hotline they called me.  I was requested to arrive at 12:30pm the next day to check in for surgery. While I felt very relieved to finally know when the surgery would be taking place, my anxiety level also increased as the whole experience was made more real.  We distracted ourselves by sending updates via telephone, Facebook, and email to notify friends and family of when the surgery was anticipated to start.  I then got online to look up Lori’s flight information and received a text message from her saying she was delayed just as I saw the delayed status online.  Her flight leaving Chicago was delayed and she was stuck on the tarmac at Detroit waiting for them to find another pilot as the primary pilot called out sick with the flu. I called the Pit and explained our situation and they were kind enough to allow us to bump our reservation back by 45 minutes even though their website said there were no more reservations available for that day.  We left and picked up Lori at the airport before continuing on to the Pit for a fabulous dinner.  More sadness set in once we were seated as I realized this was my last meal before surgery.  They were out of the beer I had wanted to try but I was able to select a 2nd one with no problem.  They also told me they were out of the meatloaf that I finally decided to try after eying it the past few times we came to the Pit but after I gave him the evil eye the waiter said he would go check and returned with good news.  We enjoyed our dinner and catching up and just being in this moment of normalcy before the unknown began.  Once we returned home it was time to take a shower using my own shampoo and some special anti-bacterial sponge provided by the hospital.  After the shower it was past midnight so I was no longer allowed to eat or drink anything and went to bed knowing I needed the rest but wishing that sleep wouldn’t make the next day come so soon.

26
Apr
26
Apr

So Duke just called and I am supposed to check in tomorrow at Duke University Hospital in Durham at 12:30 pm.  The surgery is anticipated to start about an hour and a half (so around 2:00 pm) after check in and last for 3 hours.  So if all goes well / according to plan I will be out of surgery by 5:00 pm.  Getting ready to pick up Lori from the airport (can’t wait to see her although I wish it were under better circumstances) and then go for a fun dinner at the Pit before beginning the pre-surgery routine.  Peace out!

26
Apr

Well unfortunately it has come and gone. We are packing up to leave the beach. It has been an interesting couple of days. In some ways amazing and in others not so great but I wouldn’t change it for anything. It’s times like these when you reflect and learn much about yourself and those around you. I have been humbled at times to see how many people I am surrounded with in my daily life that are so supportive and loving.

Friday night we arrived to the most amazing Birthday cake. Lori and Chris had collaborated with the cake people up the street, the beach house owner, and the handyman next door to make all of this happen. Not even Adrianne had a clue what was going on! We wandered out to see what was around and settled on a seafood bar and grill on the marina thinking we might sit on the dock and overlook the water. The food was really good and they had live music but not my scene. Once we actually got there I guess the weight of what was about to happen started hitting me and I just really didn’t want to be around people. I tried my best to have fun and enjoy the shrimp poboy that looked so amazing but I started having panic attacks and ended up just picking at dinner. We left and ended up spending a quiet relaxing evening in for the remainder of the night.

Saturday started out really good with a nice time on the beach, a couple of drinks at the Tiki Bar on the pier, and a wonderful Seafood (king crab legs) late lunch on the pier at Oceanic. It went downhill quickly after that. I got very dizzy and nauseous and was struggling not to throw up for a good couple of hours. Making matter worse I felt very tired as if I couldn’t keep my eyes open but every time I closed my eyes the dizziness got worse which made the nausea worse. Luckily by the time we arrived back at the house the nausea had subsided enough that I took a nap and felt better after that but we took it easy and hung out for the rest of the evening watching Ron White and other comedians on TV. By the time 11:30 rolled around we decided to head out to the HT for some ice cream to go with my birthday cake. We got home shortly after my Birthday and began the celebration. I got to open my cards and presents and got the Kindle I had wanted forever! It is great because it will be very helpful in the future allowing me to take all of my Oracle reference books with me instead of having to anticipate what I will need and lug around a lot of heavy books. It will also save me a lot of money because those books are typically $50 but the Kindle versions are only $35. It will also be very helpful now because it is so light I shouldn’t have a problem using it after the surgery. And even if I don’t feel up to holding and playing with it for whatever reason, it has a text-to-speech option so I could have it read books to me or download audio books to listen to.

Luckily Sunday was amazing and uneventful from a stress standpoint. It was supposed to pour down rain all day but as we got up and got moving it actually cleared up and had rather nice weather. We started the day at the Surf House which is a really cool little place. It has a surf shop on one side and a counter and set of tables / TVs on the other side serving breakfast and lunch. I had what sounds like a simple bacon, egg, and cheddar sandwich on a honey wheat bagel but it was probably the best one I have ever had. We then followed up with coffees from Port City Java before heading to the Aquarium at Fort Fisher. I haven’t been to the Aquarium in a long time (and never been to one in NC) and had been wanting to go for a while. We both had a great time and enjoyed ourselves seeing and learning about the various animals. We even got to touch a horseshoe crab and some corral. Adrianne was brave enough to pick up the horseshoe crab and flip it over to look and play with it but I didn’t want to have any part in that. After that we had a good seafood lunch outside and spent some more time on the beach in the sun at Kure beach. Another nap followed (for whatever reason I have been VERY fond of the afternoon naps this weekend) before we got ready and went to the most amazing birthday dinner. Wilmington was a very nice city and the waterfront was amazing. It reminded us both a little of Savanna and Charleston. We went to the little dipper for dinner and were greeted with a tank of Jellyfish as you first walk into the restaurant. The dinner was very good and here happened the only stressful part of the day which luckily only lasted for a few moments. We got a nice bottle of wine as is our usual birthday tradition but I had to stop drinking any because I noticed a trend. The more wine I drank the more depressed I became as I began to reflect on the coming events and how I was not ready for this weekend to end. So I focused back on the amazing dark chocolate and amaretto fondue and Adrianne did a good job of distracting me until it passed and I was back to “normal”.

So here now I sit typing this up as she is packing around me getting ready to leave. I am still not ready to go but I am happy to be taking some great memories with me. And like often happens in life I have many mixed feelings about returning home. I really don’t want to return home and end the vacation prematurely but I also want to go home and just relax and spend some down time before all the craziness starts. I also can’t wait to see Lori this evening and pick her up from the airport but then at the same rate that means that it will be time to call and find out when the surgery is tomorrow and begin my series of showers with the “special” soap. Uggh. I plan on writing one more post once I find out when the surgery is and then won’t be back on until I feel better after the surgery.

25
Apr
24
Apr